I simply do not know how people in relationships survive together. No joke here! I just can not comprehend it. How do two people who have strong opinions and feelings of their own stay together for 25 years, 50 years or longer without physically killing one another! If anyone out there would like to comment on this and tell me how it's done I would love to know. On the grand scale of relationships, I am a rookie. I need all the coaching I can get.
It's bizarre really. You can tell from the countdown timer on the right that Emily will be abroad in Wales, UK for the next 2 months. What's bizarre about this is that I don't necessarily feel like I miss her. Given the stress that we experienced in the time leading up to her departure (a bit too personal to discuss in further detail in this blog), it is amazing that one of us did not kill the other or just call the relationship quits. That is why I am so perplexed why relationships find a way to survive. Now that she is gone, the stress has dissipated and left a feeling of relief, a calm, a peacefulness. I hope the reader does not consider me a terrible boyfriend. Don't get me wrong, I do miss her a little, and that feeling will likely grow as time progresses. Right now however, this is how I feel.
I can't help but think that this must be what Meursault must have felt at the beginning of Albert Camus' novel "The Stranger". The novel starts with the death of his mother. Meursault never cries at the funeral ceremonies. He acted rather ambivalent towards the whole situation. People around him who saw this perceived it as the signature of a cold hearted emotionless man because he did not react in the way that society expected him to react. As a result, Meursault became a victim of his emotions and feelings. Internally, he was free to feel any way he wanted, free to cry or not to cry. Despite this freedom, he was judged based upon those feelings and actions.
I guess I am judging my self a little bit right now.
It's bizarre really. You can tell from the countdown timer on the right that Emily will be abroad in Wales, UK for the next 2 months. What's bizarre about this is that I don't necessarily feel like I miss her. Given the stress that we experienced in the time leading up to her departure (a bit too personal to discuss in further detail in this blog), it is amazing that one of us did not kill the other or just call the relationship quits. That is why I am so perplexed why relationships find a way to survive. Now that she is gone, the stress has dissipated and left a feeling of relief, a calm, a peacefulness. I hope the reader does not consider me a terrible boyfriend. Don't get me wrong, I do miss her a little, and that feeling will likely grow as time progresses. Right now however, this is how I feel.
I can't help but think that this must be what Meursault must have felt at the beginning of Albert Camus' novel "The Stranger". The novel starts with the death of his mother. Meursault never cries at the funeral ceremonies. He acted rather ambivalent towards the whole situation. People around him who saw this perceived it as the signature of a cold hearted emotionless man because he did not react in the way that society expected him to react. As a result, Meursault became a victim of his emotions and feelings. Internally, he was free to feel any way he wanted, free to cry or not to cry. Despite this freedom, he was judged based upon those feelings and actions.
I guess I am judging my self a little bit right now.
1 comment:
Interesting... I love that you are relieved and relaxed, even while I am away. I wouldn't want you to stress the entire time I am gone. Be productive!
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